HOW not to piss off your idol

Stefan Sagmeister is the Elvis of the graphic design world. He's a graphic design rock star and his popularity is only equal to this brilliant talent. He once carved the text for an invitation into his skin (think bloody chest and visible pubes) and promoted a fashion boutique with text made out of toilet paper. His commercial work is in high demand yet he took a year sabbatical to just ... think.

At the HOW Design Conference this weekend I got the chance to meet him — I knew this was a one in a lifetime opportunity and I only had a few seconds to make the best impression possible.

From a few feet away, I could tell he had an accent. I was talking with a Swiss friend prior to meeting Sagmeister, she asked me to find out if he, too was either Swiss or maybe German.

Me: Hi! How's it going?
Sagmeister: Great? How are you?
(Sagmeister signs my book.)
M: Oh, fine. Thanks! So are you Swiss? Or German?
S: (quickly) Niether! I'm Austrian.
M: (thinking: you pissed him off, dumbass) Oh, well what's in your iPod right now?
S: (annoyed) My iPod just got stolen on the way here.
M: (thinking: change the subject!) Can I take a picture with you?
S: Sure — ah
(click)
M: Thanks!

I bolted away from him and got out of site as quickly as possible. Later that weekend I saw him standing up — he's massive. He's like six and half feet tall. Like all rock stars.